One of my husband's good friends passed away expectantly on Sunday night. He was married for only 2 weeks and was on his way to their honeymoon. I also knew him, but I did not know his wife. There are so many feelings and thoughts running through my head. I remember hearing about him getting married and thinking about how happy I was for him, there was a quiet joy in my heart for him and his wife. And seeing his wedding pictures and how happy he and his wife were. They died in a car accident. One day, they are alive and well and the next they are gone. What I feel is an emptiness in the world. A sadness in the world. And many people around the world are grieving for their loss, assuring the world they are not forgotten, that they are fiercely missed and loved. I do not personally have a lot of experience with losing someone you love. 4 of my grandparents have passed away, with one left. 2 of my uncles have passed. But i was never close enough to fully experience the grief because I grew up in a different state. To see someone who my husband and I are friends with pass away so suddenly is so hard. And so unreal. And all you want is to be able to see them walking up to you giving you a huge hug and be able to physically talk to them. But you can't. they can be there in spirit, but its not the same.
It causes many, myself and my husband included, to look at their lives, and re-evaluate. They did not plan on losing their life 2 weeks after marriage. They were young- 28 and 30. And had such strong love for each other. I think there is so much grief for many reasons. They were kind. They were people filled with light and they brought that light when they entered a room. They were fun. They created positive relationships all around them. But its more than that even. They had just began a journey they waited a long time for. They didn't even get a chance to fully experience marriage, though their was much more blissful than many marriages. They did not get a chance to have children. And if one of them made it alive, it would still be just as devastating. And a part of me believes if they were meant to make it out alive, there would have been divine intervention. Angels helping in some way. But they left this world together. So maybe, their plan was different than most. But that doesn't make it easier. There will still be a hole in many peoples hearts. Empty chairs at a dinner table. Their belongings are there, but they are not there.
I don't know why. I don't understand why their time was cut short. I do know that they helped people around them feel love. friendship, laughter, and joy. And I know they will not be forgotten. Life and death is a process of life, and I have some understandings of it, but I do not understand the whys of why it had to happen this way. There are times where I have felt that it was just not worth it be alive, not worth the pain, the sorrow that comes. And this happens. And it makes me want to take advantage of the days I do have. Because you don't know what your last day is. As a mom of three, there are so many days where I have just wanted it to be over- and my kids to be in bed so I could take care of me. So tonight, I did not worry about the messiness of my house. I tried to soak up the smiles, tried to be more patient and loving.
I knew Stephen, and I am grateful that I did. I wish I had the opportunity to know Amy. I know that we will see them again. I pray for their families. I pray for them. Stephen, thank you for being Creighton's friend. You made his life so much better. And thank you for visiting us in Hawaii and taking our family pictures. We truly miss you so much.
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